How To Tell A Guy Is A Player
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Most girls (and women) take been in that location. They're worried a guy they similar is a player, merely how can you tell for certain? In that location are telltale signs that the boy you dear is a player but these aren't ever 100% accurate. However, when a lot of these red flags ingather up, y'all would be wise to be wary.
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1
Study his smoothness. Boys who are players aren't going to be nervous, stammering types around a girl. They volition seem almost likewise practiced, and they will flirt with you with ease because it's a game to them, and they've done this before. For example:
- They will e'er have a apposite pickup line or a flirty joke. You'll think he's "prince charming" and like yous tin can practice no wrong in his eyes.
- They're brimming with confidence around you, talk with ease, and say everything that a girl would want to hear. However, they speak in generalities rather than including meaningful details.
- They do these things before they really get to know you and volition go over the top to impress. Their words sound false and bogus.
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ii
Spot over-the-top flattery. A guy who is a role player volition seem more interested in you than anyone has earlier. At first. However, he will then cheat or just go out you one time he gets what he wants, which is physical intimacy and/or your affirmation. For example:
- He'll try to get you to experience important by showering your with flattery. He may pretend that yous share interests so that yous'll be amazed how much you have in common.
- Some flattery is sincere. Pay attention to how much, how oft, and to what caste he does it. A player's flattery will exist over-the-tiptop.
- Exist wary of "dearest bombing." This is where he bombs you with endearment, praise, clings to everything you lot say, pampers y'all, and puts yous on a pedestal. His flattery will focus primarily on your looks.
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three
Pay attention to what he never says. There are certain words that a actor is likely to never say to you. Although the player is very talkative, he'south non going to sacrifice being in control.
- A histrion is unlikely to say "I love you lot." There are a few players who will say this simply to get what they want and non mean it, but generally speaking, a player won't utter those words considering he doesn't want you to think this is long term.[1]
- A player won't say that information technology's up to you to decide what to do when information technology comes to going out. That's because he's not actually interested in your life, hobbies, desires or activities.
- A player stays in command of the timing and venue. He might fifty-fifty require that you only meet within his or your home so others don't meet you.
- If he tries to have sex with you and doesn't accept a condom, it's less probable he's a player. A player will ever come prepared because he does this a lot.[two]
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4
Pay attention to how he talks about past girlfriends. If a guy is a player, he's probably hurt a lot of women or girls before. In order to throw you off the smell, he will projection his beliefs on them. He volition act similar he was victimized past them.
- He will trash talk his exes, by calling them "psycho" or "crazy" and endeavour to make yous think that he was the victim and the breakup was all their error.
- If he does this repeatedly or most more than ane person, start questioning whether the person engaging in bad behavior was actually him.
- Pay attending to how other girls in his orbit care for you. Players tend to have lots of girls effectually them, especially desperate ones who seem angry at them.
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i
Notice if he flirts with other girls. A guy who is a player isn't going to be satisfied with just the attending of i girl, y'all. Instead, he will seek affidavit from many girls and in many corners, and he will sometimes do this when he is with you.
- He likes being in the spotlight and gets pleasure from female attention. He wants to "capture" as many girls equally he tin can, as if making some other notch on his belt.
- He volition flirt with lots of girls because he likes to have them chasing him or interested in him. He'll entice them to crush on him through things like steady eye contact.
- He volition flirt with others by grinning, telling jokes, and initiating friendly chat. If you confront him, he'll deny that he was flirting with other people.
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2
Spot whether he moves as well fast. A guy who is a actor is interested in physical contact with you right away. Since that'due south often his cardinal goal, he sees no reason to accept it slow. He is eager to cut to the chase and get what he'due south really later on.
- He won't carp to develop emotional intimacy because all he wants is concrete intimacy. He'll go for it faster than a guy who's truly interested in developing a longer term relationship with yous.
- He will touch you on the first date, perhaps by kissing you lot (or even trying to move farther if you will let him). He sees no reason to patiently wait.
- Past the second date, his patience will be exhausted, and he may try to get physical with you. If he senses that y'all want to go slower, he'll move on to be someone else with whom with he has a better chance.
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iii
Study his actions. A lot of girls make the mistake of focusing on a boy's words instead of paying attention to his actions. A role player volition practise things similar human activity similar it'southward a chore to find time for you. His pretty words may be designed to flatter you by luring y'all into liking him. Focus on what he does, not what he says. For example:
- He'due south a player if he texts you lot at the last minute, controls when he sees you, and vanishes for long periods of fourth dimension. A genuine guy volition requite you more freedom.
- He's not a player if he asks you on actual dates and wants you to come across his friends and family. A role player will be mysterious and hide aspects of his personal life.
- A player may text you lot right as confined or restaurants are closing considering he secretly doesn't want it to be a appointment. A non-histrion will plan ahead with yous.
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4
Sentinel his body language. A thespian thinks he's charming, and he plays it to the hilt. He'southward a flirtatious, overly confident, braggart. He thinks he's all that, so he doesn't effort to pretend to exist humble. For example:[3]
- A histrion volition swagger or strut when he walks. He will sometimes smirk, as if he has a hidden secret.
- A player will often bear upon other people a lot, merely he'll avoid public displays of amore with you around other people. He'll simply be affectionate in private.
- A player volition exist an extrovert and outgoing. He'll talk a lot and savor being the centre of attention. He'll also utilise a lot of direct eye contact, one of the strongest signs of a role player.
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5
Figure out whether he answers the phone right away. A player won't be able to answer the phone right away all the time. The reason: There are people he doesn't want to know well-nigh you, and he might exist with i of them at that time.
- Possibly he's with another girl. Possibly he's with guy friends. Perhaps he'southward with family members. The key is that he doesn't want them to know you lot're calling.
- He screens his calls. He'll call yous dorsum, merely he won't answer the phone right away. Similarly, if he doesn't answer his phone when you're with him, there may be another girl that he doesn't desire yous to know about.
- The same goes for texting. If he takes forever to answer to a text, there could be a reason for it: He's busy with someone else. He would never let you see his texts.
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one
Analyze whether you're impulsive effectually him. Boys who are players will attempt to trigger impulsiveness in you because this works out to their advantage; they desire you to violate your boundaries on concrete intimacy fast. For example:
- He allows y'all to recollect that there'due south an instant emotional connection, possibly even saying that you're soulmates or sending you romantic songs.
- He's trying to become you to cross your boundaries and then that he can get what he is after, which is concrete intimacy.
- He'll lose interest in a girl who reasserts her boundaries, seems very cautious, and requires patience because he's not really interested in a relationship.
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2
Make him wait. The all-time fashion to sort out for sure whether a guy is a player or not is to make him wait a significant time for whatever concrete intimacy with yous.
- If he'southward not a player, he will exist OK with this and respect you more than because y'all're not "easy."
- If he's a histrion, he'll exist annoyed past this and will try to cajole you into breaking your boundaries. When this doesn't work, he'll dump you. Be aware, however, that some players who can wait a long time to get what they want.
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iii
Pay attention to whether he keeps y'all surreptitious. A player will have a reason to either proceed you hugger-mugger or only to downplay your human relationship to others so that he can keep playing the field with other girls.
- The reason is sadly that he wants to keep his options open up to mess around with lots of girls, and if he tells people he has a girlfriend, other girls might stay away.
- It'south important to see whether he tells other people well-nigh you, and whether he downplays the state of the relationship to them if he does.
- Does he say things to you that signal y'all're exclusive, but acts distant to y'all effectually other people? If he's downplaying you, he's probably a thespian.
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four
Pay attention to his relationships. Other people around him, who take known him longer, volition have had time to see his patterns. Bank check out his other relationships, and maybe talk to some of those people. For example:
- If his friends don't think highly of him, they've probably observed his bad behavior. Some other bad sign is if his male friends are also known players.
- Is he mostly friends with girls? That's a bad sign. Information technology means that guys have figured out he'south not a very expert person, and he doesn't like the male competition.
- Is he still connected to his ex in a manner that goes beyond being platonic? Exercise girls seem desperate around him or are now angry at him? If then, he probably did to them what he's well-nigh to practise to you.
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5
See whether he cares a lot about his appearance. It's good if a male child cares if he looks prissy. That's non the point. But if he's over the top about it, there's a greater chance he's a player.
- For example, a histrion will spend a lot of fourth dimension working out and will brag nigh and show off his muscles. He puts a high premium on concrete advent.
- This will extend to how he dresses. He will likely be seen in overnice dress, including flashing expensive labels to bear witness off.
- His automobile volition as well be flashy. In that location'south aught subtle about this guy. He uses his body, his clothes, and his car to draw girls.
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six
Cheque out his social media. The mode a guy presents himself on social media tin give you a sense of whether he is a actor or not. If he is a player, he volition use social media to attempt to attract girls.
- Check his human relationship status. Players may oft pretend that they're single online or hibernate their status.[4]
- Players will have lots of bonny girls on their friend list. Their comments will be flirty in nature.
- Their photos and videos on social media sites will be designed to showcase their physical bewitchery. He won't seem to heed or discourage flirting.
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Add New Question
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Question
What does information technology mean when a guy is a histrion?
Maya Diamond is a Dating and Relationship Coach in Berkeley, CA. She has 13 years of feel helping singles stuck in frustrating dating patterns find internal security, heal their by, and create good for you, loving, and lasting partnerships. She received her Master'south in Somatic Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies in 2009.
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Adept Answer
A player is someone who doesn't really want a human relationship, merely they may exist dishonest about their attentions because they desire sex or attending. When you're dating, look out for a false myth, or a lack of sincerity in the way someone holds themselves. If yous listen to your body, your intuition, and your heart, you lot tin usually tell if someone is beingness genuine or not.
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Question
See if your boyfriend'due south friend tells you to 'die' and your fellow doesn't practise anything but only laughs, what does this mean?
It means he'southward immature and cares more about looking absurd to his friend than your hurt feelings. Not a skilful sign.
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Question
The guy I like likes me back just he is a actor and has had 3 girlfriends since we found out we liked each other. He keeps flirting with my all-time friend, and I'yard starting to wonder if he actually likes me. What do you remember? He told me he didn't, but I'g starting to think otherwise.
Your reply is correct in your annotate. If he'south flirting with your best friend and he has had three other girlfriends and told you he doesn't like you, then, minimally, he also likes other people. This guy will cause nothing but hurting. The writing is on the wall. Look elsewhere.
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Question
How do we know if a boy likes you lot?
He will want to spend fourth dimension with yous, won't move too fast physically, volition come upwards with reasons to see you or talk to you lot, will make y'all experience good about yourself, will be available for you, won't hide things from you, and will innovate you lot to others who matter to him.
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Question
I kind of like my friend. We e'er used to hang out together. He has a girlfriend who lives far from his house. He doesn't accept any physical relationship with his girlfriend. But in one case after a party, nosotros were concrete. After that I started liking him. So can you tell me he loves me or non?
Going after a guy with a girlfriend is usually going to atomic number 82 to hurting. He may not be emotionally available, and may be substituting you in for the part that doesn't piece of work or because he doesn't get to see her much. Talk to him about it. Tell him your feelings or ask him to practise something romantic, and encounter what he says. Or go after a guy who is free.
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Question
What if he talks to you at night and not at day time?
This depends on his job or school schedule. Maybe he's just also busy to talk. In fact, if he always talks to yous at nighttime, that's a good sign. Information technology means he'due south non with someone else. Nonetheless, if he has time to call during the day but chooses non to, it could be that he's interested in only getting physical with you. To figure out which is which, encounter whether there are other red flags. If, for case, he schedules dates with you and has introduced you to his friends and parents, it'southward probably OK.
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Discover if he stares at girls when you're around. This means that he may not be listening to you lot or caring too much nigh the conversation.
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If your family members or friends hate him, there's probably a good reason.
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Practise people refer to him as a thespian?
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About This Commodity
Article Summary 10
If the boy you lot beloved is a thespian, there should be crimson flags to watch out for, like moving fast and flirting with other girls. It's great for a boy to compliment you, but if he'due south e'er flattering you and telling you lot how perfect you are, be careful. Players will effort to make y'all experience really special without taking the fourth dimension to get to know y'all. If he wants to become physical with you correct away, he's probably a thespian. If a boy really likes you, he'll expect until you lot're comfortable. A role player will as well be flirty with lots of other girls to proceed his options open. If he avoids you around other people or tries to keep your relationship a hugger-mugger, it might be because he'south trying to play the field. For more tips from our Relationship co-author, including how to tell if a male child is a player by his social media accounts, read on!
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How To Tell A Guy Is A Player,
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